And so I awoke from a dream. Someone had said, "I need to remind you to read the book of Matthew". And minutes later an email quoting Matthew. And later still at church, quotes from Matthew, and a conversation afterwards with my pastor, who suggested another chapter in Matthew. I had to tell him my dream then.
I had been in such turmoil, questioning not only Christians, but dealing with strobe-thoughts of doubt about Christ being the son of God. I think perhaps I occasionally hear something in my dreams because God knows I need a two by four up the side of my head in order to get through to me.
I'm so grateful for holy nudges that have no rational explanation.
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9 comments:
what would you have done if no nudges were forthcoming?
i ask because the beginning of your story sounds remarkably similar to the (admittably few) biographies and autobiographies of christians-turned-atheists/agnostics i've read.
i also ask because i wonder why god didn't speak to them when they were so in doubt. maybe the answer can be found in the lives of those who do claim to hear god.
(and no, i'm not hinting at any forthcoming "deconversion." i just enjoy thinking. :) )
For me it was the book of Mark. How interesting. Everywhere I turned it was about Mark.
Let me know how it goes with Matthew. Praying for you Anne!
Oh, Lydia, good question. I know what would have happened, even if no nudges were forthcoming. I would have turned back to Christ; I have no doubt. But in this crazy faith journey I also find I turn more toward Catholicism and Universalist thought (at least in the very minimalist way I understand it at present). Most of all I am interested in metanoia - the radical change of mind and heart that Jesus spoke of. My path is following him, but as far as what flavor of Christian I am, I'm a bit clueless.
Hey Anne,
For me it's so funny that your post talked about dreams. Last night a bucks a friend was talking about a muslum who was converted through two dreams. Maybe the subconcious (dreams) are God's way of communicating when we've in some way turned off or are distracted in our consciousness.
anyhow...don't know if that's true or not but it was an interesting convo.
and...
why does it say 'young men' dream dreams while 'old men' see visions? What does age have to do with it...other than the fact that when my head hits the pillow i'm out for 6-7 hours :P
Karen, how interesting that you were also led to a specific book in the Bible. I will let you know how it goes with Matthew. Lee mentioned Matthew 18 so I turned there, but my first thought upon awakening was, "what/where in Matthew??!" So, of course I have to read with a meditative eye and see if I am once more whacked across the head by God. :)
Rick, interesting that you just had a dream conversation with a friend about someone's conversion. It was a dream that made my decision for me about being baptized as an adult. It makes sense to me that God might use our sleep time to communicate with us. When are we closer to death or to the afterlife?
'"In the Last Days," God says, "I will pour out my Spirit on every kind of people: Your sons will prophesy, also your daughters; Your young men will see visions, your old men dream dreams.'
Here it's the old men who dream dreams - is that a gentler way of seeing God than having visions, or is that the same thing only said in a different way, as is often done in Psalms?
I love it when God nudges me this way (where you encounter one message so many times)....it usually takes a few times before I get the point.
AnneGogh....
Have a Merry Christmas!!!!
Miss chatting with you at the OOZE...I do check out your blog on a regular basis, though.
Send some of your Michigan winter my way...it's supposed to be in the 50s or 60s here, and that just ain't right! :)
Kingsjoy! How nice of you to pop up! I would be glad to share some snowy weather with you, or maybe trade a 50 degree day. It was sunny and 35 here today - it felt like springtime!
Have a joyful, blessed Christmas yourself,
Anne
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